The only messages I get from God lately are "be paitiant". So, I've tried to stay back, give space, wait...it isn't easy for me but I guess either her mind will change or her memory will fade.
By the time Once Wife left it was nothing but anger & the split was long over due...there was no grieving, no loss, no future plans.
It has been over 35 years since I've had to deal with a relationship just going "POOF!"
The silence right now is like when she is mad, but my gut still feels this is the wrong choice, that her mind will change, but I'm probably wrong.
I have had a lot of time to analyze the time frame, to really look, really think, & I genuinely can lock down the issues starting with an exact point with her job. When her work load & duties had a shift. Suddenly they shipped her a lot of stuff to do her job's new aspect--an aspect she is overwhelmingly qualified to do & even more than what she was doing prior. It was about then that everything suddenly shifted.
Maybe she feels more fulfilled with the job than with the thought of me?
I'm still not mad at her. I'm not upset with her. I'm lonely, but I was lonely before so that isn't really different. As I've said before I can't regret her; she showed me parts of myself I hadn't seen. She helped me grow in ways no one had before. I owe her a lot.
Do I hope she will have a change of heart? Yes. Will she? I don't know for sure. I'm not even sure she still reads my time line.
Maura out
No comments:
Post a Comment